Even though I no longer live in my hometown, I still keep up on the news since many of my friends and family are still there, and it gives a few minutes of conversation. I also keep abreast (haha) of the news because I think it's funnier than hell when I see someone I used to know make the news for doing something stupid, or occasionally one of them will write into the paper and it's usually a good (enlightening and/or poignant) read.
Here is the article on this soon-to-be Darwin Award Winner:
local/crime-and-courts/ article_48701a32-fe1b-5c25- bb90-7c690c385f14.html
This is my depiction of this guy:
Now, I'm proud to say that I don't know this guy, but if I did, I'd tell him he was a dumbass and then I would turn him in to the local Crimestoppers and collect my $1000 reward, which was more than this fucktard got.